About Dating & Relationships > Getting Over Betrayal

How do I get over extreme anger at my previous close friend and lover who, as it turned out, betrayed me? -- Anne S., 60, Houston, Texas

Anne, harboring anger is a sign you haven't healed yet. Time will help you do that as well as an attitude check. The anger does you no good, it's misdirected energy. You can't change the past, only live for today and plan tomorrow. Often, when people betray us, down the road the adversity we go through turns into opportunity. It's hard to realize that when adversity strikes. My wife cleaned out our home and left on Christmas Eve without warning ten years ago. I was angry and upset. But, now, my life is wonderful and I'm in the greatest relationship one could ever hope for. This wouldn't be happening if my wife hadn't left. Forgive and move forward. Prove to yourself that you're going to end up in a far better place someday in the future.

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Tom Blake has written more than 600 newspaper columns on middle age dating and relationships. His "Single Again" column is featured in the Orange County (Calif.) Register. Tom is the author of two books: "Finding Love After 50: How to Begin. Where to Go. What to Do" and "Middle Aged and Dating Again." He has made multiple appearances as a keynote speaker at national AARP conventions and as a dating after 50 expert on the NBC show, Today. Sign up for Tom's free weekly "Finding Love After 50" e-letter, read previous columns or order books at www.findingloveafter50.com.

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